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| Wednesday February 14 2018 |
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By Matt Chorley
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Happy Valentine's Day,
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Roses are red,
Red Box is too,
I make no further comment on our relationship
Which I understand is a purely professional one.
- Red Box is a must-read in No 10, and across Westminster. Know someone who is missing out? Get them signed up today thetimes.co.uk/redbox
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Must reads
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- Oxfam hired Roland van Hauwermeiren, the aid worker at the centre of the sex exploitation scandal in Haiti, two years after he was forced out of another British humanitarian agency over claims about his use of prostitutes.
- Alexei Navalny, Russia’s opposition leader, uses an interview in The Times to urge Google and Facebook to refuse Kremlin demands to block his latest investigation about a government official meeting an oligarch on a yacht with a group of female escorts.
- A senior member of Momentum met members of the left-wing Greek government this week as the pro-Jeremy Corbyn network seeks to strengthen its international presence.
- Forget the overpriced restaurants and petrol station flowers, 5 per cent more babies are conceived in Valentine’s week than in an average week, according to NHS figures analysed for the first time.
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New party launches
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(Well, dozens of them in fact)
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Surely the time has come for a new political party. Come weeping Remoaners and discontented Kippers. The grieving Cameroons and moribund members of the Milifandom.
As the two main parties go rushing to the extremes, this great vast, mushy, liberal, Blairite, Cleggite centrist centreground in the centre has opened up. It just begging for some bright young things with a social media account and some cool fonts to come rushing in and deliver unto a grateful nation the British Macron.
Who will lead this march of the middle? Who are we told will call the masses from Waitrose and Center Parcs and their little holiday place in the Dordogne? Chuka Umunna is often mentioned. Perhaps George Osborne, Nick Clegg or Tony Blair, once the power to wipe the collective memory of 60 million people has been perfected. And one of the best names linked with this great enterprise: Ruth Davidson. As if.
Well for those people yearning for a new political I bring great news. It has been launched. And not just one.
Since the start of the year 12 new political parties have been set up. As Lucy Fisher reveals in The Times today, more than 50 were registered last year, a record high since the Electoral Commission began recording them in 1999.
Those waiting for a centrist party need wait no more. The Centrist Party was started by David Barker last year. Dining al fresco, candle burning in a jar tied with raffia, a drop of red wine in a vast glass: the website could not be more centrist if it were streaming Corinne Bailey Rae on every page.
It is important to remember that the Centrist Party is not to be confused with Centrist Party UK, which appears to have been wound up in 2012.
There are plenty of other parties started in the last year to choose from. Alongside dozens of ultra-local campaigns, to save hospitals or represent resident groups, you could support the pro-Brexit United Kingdom Veterans' and People's Party or the anti-Brexit Renew. Or perhaps Legacy, Aspire, Resolve, UKremainEU and Sovereign Republic.
Then there's the Taking the Initiative Party, the Ninety-Nine Per Cent Party, the Money Free Party and the Friends Party.
Also launched this year, the Psychedelic Future Party, has a number of inspirational slogans including “Change Your Mind”, “Better Than This” and “Kamaclipse!” Sally Cogley launched the Rubbish Party last year, and got elected. In fact she won as many seats in May 2017 as the other rubbish party, Ukip.
Perhaps being the next Ukip is what these parties aspire to. Not the racist candidates and policies and girlfriends. But launching a campaign which ultimately bears fruit, achieving a life-long goal once dreamt up over the eighth pint of Tribute in a proper English pub.
Back in 2010 the last rites were read for two-party politics: coalition and power-sharing and hung parliaments were here to stay. In 2015 the two main parties were revived, snuffing out their smaller rivals. In 2017 they grew bigger still, gaining a combined share of the result not seen for decades.
Yet this seems to have triggered a sharp rise in political activism which suggests the pendulum could yet swing back the other way.
We just need to agree which of the dozens of new parties to vote for instead.
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YESTERDAY'S QUESTION: We asked what should happen to the two captured British jihadists who were part of the terror cell known as the Beatles. Most of you wanted them to be killed. Full results here
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Podcast: David Baddiel interview
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They say that politics is showbusiness for ugly people. But increasingly it's for showbusiness people too.
In this week's Red Box podcast, I talk to the comedian, author and compulsive tweeter David Baddiel about how social media has forced him to become more political, dealing with antisemitism online, how all politicians are secretly "winging it", the Ukip version of Three Lions, and why Tony Blair is like Bob Monkhouse.
Listen to the podcast
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Today's cartoon from The Times by Peter Brookes
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Boris ❤ Remainers
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It was billed as the "Valentine's Day Massacre" but instead Boris Johnson's big speech on Brexit is expected to be an exercise in whispering sweet nothings into the ear of whoever will listen.
The speech is designed to reunite a divided nation: “If we are to carry this project through to national success – as we must – then we must also reach out to those who still have anxieties.
"It is not good enough to say to Remainers – you lost, get over it; because we must accept that many are actuated by entirely noble sentiments, a real sense of solidarity with our European neighbours and a desire for the UK to succeed.”
In private in recent days the foreign secretary has been promising not to rock the boat. There had been talk that No 10 took a red pen to the early draft, though this has been dismissed by Johnson's allies. If Downing Street had got their hands on it, they might have toned down his warning to Theresa May that it would be “intolerable and undemocratic” if Britons were made to follow EU laws over which they had no control.
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Artists 4 Brexit
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Michael Lightfoot’s illustration of the first Artists 4 Brexit meeting
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Given the overwhelming sighs of dismay from Britain’s cultural community since the 2016 referendum, the fledgling Artists 4 Brexit group has become perhaps the most unlikely advocate for divorce from the European Union.
Michael Lightfoot, the artist who convened the group, said: “Most of our friends are Remain supporters and there is a substantial chunk that have turned into monsters."
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Read the full story
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Bordering on farce
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It might be easier and use less paper if parliament's select committees just published reports on the areas of the state which are going to be ready for Brexit.
Today the home affairs select committee warns that Border Force is not equipped to deal with extra checks on EU citizens after Brexit, with MPs “increasingly alarmed” about the impact of inadequate resources.
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Read the full story
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Chart of the day
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Ever the optimists, Lib Dems like Valentine's Day more than other voters, according to YouGov profiles. People who backed the Tories last year are more likely to say they dislike the day of love. Hearts of stone.
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Tweet of the day
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Nothing is more romantic than a benefit fraud crackdown. The Department for Work and Pensions got into the mood with this delightful tweet, warning people that if they are declaring their love today, they must also declare any changes in their living arrangements to avoid being jailed. Cute.
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Powder in the post
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Counterterrorism police were called to the Houses of Parliament yesterday after a suspect package delivered to an MP’s office was found to contain white powder, later confirmed as "non-harmful".
My first front-page story on the Taunton Times was 16 years ago this week. A friend had told me about how her boyfriend had been woken in the middle of the night by anti-terror police after a suspect letter was intercepted at a sorting office when white powder fell out of it.
Who would want to be sending a student in Somerset deadly powder, the police demanded to know? After much discussion it turned out that the letter had been sent by my friend, who had romantically put some Loveheart sweets in the envelope. The broken hearts turned to dust.
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Party animals
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Hmmm. It's almost like Michael Gove's Dr Dolittle act has had some effect and voters rather like his efforts to talk to the animals.
So today we get Labour's response, a 50-point draft policy: If you eat foie gras, want your rental property to stay pet free or ever run over a cat, Team Corbyn is gunning for you.
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Read the full story
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Ones to watch today
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- Damian Hinds, the education secretary, announces that thousands of primary school pupils will start taking online tests next month to show that they know their times tables. Read the full story
- Scottish Labour is suffering a fresh bout of in-fighting with leftwingers hitting out at centrists and accusing them of trying to undermine Richard Leonard, just days after Jeremy Corbyn toured Scotland with him. Read the full story
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‘Clean up or lose cash’
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Penny Mordaunt, the international development secretary, is in Stockholm for a long-planned speech to the foreign aid groups and politicians, which will be watched more closely as a result of the Oxfam scandal.
She has a blunt message: “Unless you safeguard everyone your organisation comes into contact with, including beneficiaries, staff and volunteers, we will not fund you.
"Unless you create a culture that prioritises the safety of vulnerable people and ensures victims and whistleblowers can come forward without fear, we will not work with you.
"And unless you report every serious incident or allegation, no matter how damaging to your reputation, we cannot be partners."
The speech starts at 8.30am UK time, and will be streamed here
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Remember the members
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Momentum is on a recruitment drive, claiming that it already has 36,000 and hopes to overtake the Tories by the next election.
Then last night I got an email from "Ready for Rees-Mogg", a group set up after the election fiasco, boasting: "In less than a year, we’ve hit an impressive 70,000 registered supporters. That makes us the largest right-leaning campaign group in the country - beating other groups that have been around for more than a decade."
Jacob Rees-Mogg tells the ConservativeHome Moggcast podcast that David Cameron once tried to stop him even becoming an MP.
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Demanding an apology
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Esther McVey uses her first interview as work and pensions secretary to publicly call on John McDonnell to apologise for joking about her being "lynched". She tells the Daily Mail: "What enabled people and permitted them to bully me online was the words of John McDonnell, because that gave permission."
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MP for Legoland
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Stuart Andrew, the Tory MP, is the subject of an Instagram account called Stuart Legodrew which shows a Lego model of the government whip in various scenarios, The Daily Telegraph reports.
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| Tweet of the day |
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In worrying news, I’ve found a herbal tea that matches my @timesredbox mug
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@tombridge89
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Understanding the numbers
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Once a month, just before PMQs, the latest employment figures are released. Tories will welcome them, then attack Labour for not welcoming them. Labour will attack them, and so on.
Except it turns out neither side really understands them. The Office for National Statistics has decided the data will now be released on Tuesdays, the day before PMQs, to give MPs more time to work out what they mean.
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Read the full story
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Around the world
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US: The White House received a completed security report last year on a top aide to President Trump accused of abusing two ex-wives, the head of the FBI said yesterday. Read the full story
FRANCE: President Macron has insisted his government will reintroduce national service in France despite warnings that it will prove a financial and legal minefield. Read the full story
SOUTH AFRICA: The African National Congress has threatened to throw President Zuma to the “vultures” in parliament and suffer the indignity of being kicked out if he does not resign.
Read the full story
SWITZERLAND: The bank accounts of world chess have been frozen after its president was accused of facilitating the funding of Islamic State terrorists. Read the full story
ISRAEL: Police in Israel recommended last night that Binyamin Netanyahu be charged with bribery, fraud and breach of trust after completing a year-long corruption investigation. Read the full story
AUSTRALIA: Australia’s deputy prime minister was fighting to keep his job yesterday a week after he admitted that his former press secretary was pregnant with his child. Read the full story
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Also in the news
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- JULIAN ASSANGE: Judge says Assange should have the courage to face justice (The Times)
- TESTING WATERS: Navy warship to sail through disputed sea (The Times)
- COST OF LIVING: Households feeling pinch as inflation sticks at 3% (The Times)
- NOT WANTED: Captured jihadists are your problem, says US (The Times)
- ANTIBIOTIC RESISTANCE: Rise of superbugs puts everyday surgical operations in jeopardy (The Times)
- COMMONWEALTH CONUNDRUM: Commonwealth conundrum: who on earth can replace the Queen? (The Times)
- PARADISE PROPERTIES: 97,000 homes owned by foreign firms (The Times)
- CLADDING COSTS: Help-to-buy tenants face £40m bill for new cladding (The Times)
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| TMS |
| From the diary |
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By Grant Tucker
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Foxy Farage clued up
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Nigel Farage, the three-time Ukip leader, was forced to undergo a diversity awareness course as part of his Fox News contract. “I learnt all about the modern world,” Farage said. “I was surprised at how little interaction is allowed in the office in case of causing offence.” Presumably he’ll stick to causing offence in pubs instead.
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Read more from the TMS diary
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What the papers say
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The Times
"Today’s shadow cabinet joins a pantheon of hard-left animal lovers. Lenin was a notorious cat person; Ken Livingstone a keeper or, in the jargon, a fancier of newts. That the present leadership has taken up the animal welfare mantle should be no surprise to close watchers of Jeremy Corbyn. Evidence of his affection for the natural world is to be found in his beloved allotment, and of course in his attachment to that bedrock of the natural world, the magic money tree." Read the full article
The Guardian
"For an organisation that from apartheid to global inequality has a fine record on the side of virtue, to mark its 75th anniversary with a grotesque abuse of power by its own workers is a terrible fall. The Charity Commission inquiry must be the start of a process of repair." Read the full article
Financial Times
"London requires a joined-up strategy above and below ground to encourage people to come back to public transport. If the population continues to rise, and London wishes to remain one of the pre-eminent global cities, politicians and civic leaders must ensure its transport system is on the right track." Read the full article
The Daily Telegraph
"In recent decades, Oxfam’s mission to relieve hunger has expanded dramatically, as have the resources of time and money that it calls upon so many millions to donate. Now, for example, it declares that it is intent on holding the powerful to account, and campaigns on issues from climate change to UK arms sales. Arguably, in the process of growing ever larger, it has lost its way." Read the full article
The Sun
"Buccaneering Boris is back — and about time too. It’s good to see a senior Minister flying the flag for Brexit, rather than apologising for it." Read the full article
Daily Mail
"Too often, ministers have seemed to approach Brexit as an exercise in damage limitation. This paper hopes the Foreign Secretary's determinedly upbeat speech will be the first of many, switching the emphasis to the magnificent opportunities waiting to be seized."
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Agenda
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Today
- Boris Johnson, the foreign secretary, gives a speech on Brexit
- Philip Hammond, the chancellor, visits the Netherlands
- Nick Gibb, the schools minister, makes an announcement on new tests
- Labour launches a new 50-point draft policy document on animal welfare
- Nato defence ministers meet in Brussels
- Government delays, uncertainty, and under-resourcing have left the UK's borders and immigration systems unprepared for Brexit, according to the home affairs select committee.
- Public contract failures are leading to a loss of trust in the operation of major disability benefits, according to the work and pensions committee
Houses of Parliament
- Both houses are on recess until Tuesday February 20
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